Entitlement

When the twins were about four years old, The Deuce asked me, totally out of the blue,

"Who's my step dad?"

"You don't have one," I responded, surprised. At that point, my ex and I were still married.

I remember how my response pissed her off.

"Well, why not? You've got one."

She had a point. I have a step mom and step dad, both of whom the kids and I adore. Deuce felt let down that she, too, didn't have one. Annoyed, she sulked off and didn't bring up the subject again.

Fast-forward four years to when Mark and I told the kids we were getting married. After telling them we were engaged, I leaned over and asked Deuce,

"You know what this means?" After a split-second hesitation -- the light bulb went on.

"I'm getting a step dad!" she cheered. I half expected her to add, "Finally."

In my own childhood, I remember being a surprised when I met my step parents for the first time. This was the 80's. I didn't know anyone who had a real, live step parent. I was the first kid in my class to enter into such a unique family arrangement. Cinderella was the first time I even heard the word stepmother and, well, you know how that one goes.

So imagine my surprise when I saw they were fun, warm and loving. They were even good looking. Without warts or evil laughter of any kind. Hell, my new step mom (Grandma Judy) was actually cool. She drove a Firebird, had long, beautiful hair (like Crystal Gayle's) and had cable TV.

She was a freaking dream come true.

Seriously, having an extended family has been a blessing. I think the fact that The Deuce felt short changed for not having a step of her own speaks volumes.

So, as the wedding date approaches, the excitement and anticipation is building. Everyone's excited that Mark's joining our family. And a little girl's indignation at not having a step dad of her own will soon be a thing of the past.