Explaining Elvis.

Okay, file this under Weirdest Conversations Ever...

The other night at dinner, I served banana slices with peanut butter. As the kids licked their chops about to devour the treat, I innocently told them that Elvis used to eat peanut butter and banana sandwiches. I honestly doubted they even knew who Elvis was.

Then The Deuce announces:

"Elvis Presley died of a heat attack while sitting on the toilet."

Huh?! Apparently a fifth grader told her so on the playground.

Seizing the opportunity for an educational lesson, I explained the Elvis once was a very popular singer. The kids loved him. Cute girls wanted to dance with him and boys dressed like him because they thought he was cool. To put Elvis into terms they could understand, I compared him to Zac Efron or one of the Jonas Brothers. Then I explained how Elvis got mixed up with drugs. He turned from a healthy, popular guy into a heavy, out of shape addict who had his heart give out.

It worked. The girls started talking about what they'd do if someone offered them drugs ("I'd say, 'NO WAY!'") and how they thought the people that gave Elvis drugs were probably just after Elvis's money. In the end, I was pleased with how the dinner-table talk concluded.

A few hours later, I took the girls to the library. Wanting to pick out a book of my own, I looked through the biography section. The Deuce found me, looking at the titles. I told her I was stumped by what to select.

She then saw a biography on Elvis.

"You could get this," she said, handing me the book. "Oh wait. No." she said taking the book out of my hand.

She put it back on the shelf. "We all know how it ends."